10 Pounds Gone!

D'oh

What is going on?  Is the Earth spinning backwards or something?

I don't know about anyone else, but I am feeling completely off and just -- wrong.

The scale didn't budge this week... not an ounce one way or another.  I know I'm lacking in the effort department right now, but seriously?  I haven't been binging on junk food or anything, either.

I have been really sick.  Celiac-related sick.  I was up for almost two hours last night, doubled over in gastrointestinal distress.  My Jason helped me run through everything I consumed all weekend -- no gluten that we could identify.  Possibly I have been into a hidden gluten source, or (probably?), my body is still trying to heal from all the damage that's been done to it.

My psoriasis has been especially bad these past few days -- which is probably linked to my celiac flare-up.  (Both disorders are autoimmune-related).

I'm showing many symptoms of Sjögren's Syndrome, which is another autoimmune condition strongly linked to celiac disease.

Allow me just this one moment of self-pity --

This sucks.  Really bad.  Sigh, woe is me, and whatnot.

I need to get into the fighting spirit.  I know I can shake this!  It's GO TIME.

The Con

I hate when people use the elevator to go up one level.

It's even worse when they use it to go DOWN one level.

I work in an office building with many spoiled (and largely obese) state workers who evidently have something against using the stairs.  This obsession means that a short jaunt on the elevator can easily take up to five minutes to complete.

In the name of fairness, let me just say a whole lot, given the fact that I use the elevator, too.  I always ride from Floor 2B (way in the basement) to Floor 6 (with is a total of 8 floors and 16 flights of stairs up) when I arrive each morning.

HOWEVER -- if I'm going down, I always take the stairs.  (I might get a little dizzy from all the down-and-around, but it isn't too strenuous).  Going up, it depends on how far I have to go.  If we're talking up to three or four levels, I'll take the stairs.  Any more than that and I generally go 50/50 (example: take the elevator from 2B up to Floor 2 or 3, then take the stairs up to 6).  Each week, I try to climb more stairs than I did the week before.

Sure, I have lazy days and weeks, but at least I'm making an effort.  Constant disregard for health and wellbeing makes me a little cranky, especially when the person complains as they continue to indulge in their negative habit (example: taking the elevator up one level with your arms full of vending machine junk from the cafeteria while complaining that your back hurts).

Actually, I might just be grumpy because I gained weight this week -- a full 1.1 lbs.  Speaking of accountability for one's own wellbeing, who here has been binging on gluten-packed foods, then wondering why (a) she doesn't feel well, and (b) she gained weight.  Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Well, I'm tired of feeling crappy all the time -- especially because I have complete control over my health on this one.  It's really, seriously time to go strictly gluten-free.  Good-bye, wheat, barley, and rye products... I'll miss you forever.

Healthy You Update #1

I am now officially recognized by the Healthy You Challenge! I'm new to the community aspect of blogging, but so far am enjoying myself. It's truly inspiring to read about other people's experiences and successes -- weight loss is difficult but possible, and it's nice to know that people are backing me on this (and that I can make a difference by supporting others, too!)

That said, this past week has been emotionally and physically challenging. It's been just over a week since I ate my last trace of gluten (accidentally), and with each day that passes, I'm feeling (physically) better. The disappointing factor is that I won't feel 100% normal until every last ounce of gluten has left my system -- and gluten is stored in fat cells, so as I continue to lose weight, gluten will be slowly released. It acts as a toxin or poison, so I can look forward to some icky days until I'm truly "clean." I've been under a lot of emotional strain, and my doctor has suggested that I try seeing a health psychologist, who could help me process my diagnosis. I'm open to this idea, but I'd like to come to terms with having celiac disease on my own first.

I gained weight at my weigh-in on Sunday, but less than half a pound. The gain may also be due to girly-related bloating. Out of curiosity, I stepped on the scale this morning and weighed in at 193.2 -- so at least we're heading in the right direction.

My goals for the week:

• Drink at least 70 ounces of water each day
• Go for (at least) a 15-minute walk each work day
• Get husband to help me set up the weight machine
• Accomplish (at least) 90 minutes of aerobic exercise
• Weight goal for next weigh-in:  191.5 lbs

I want my goals to be challenging but reasonable.  Baby steps.  These goals push my present routine, but shouldn't be too difficult.  I need to see change so that I can kick my excitement and motivation into high gear!

Have a great and successful week, everyone!

PMS Monster

The office smells like buttery pancakes and syrup, and how the hell is that fair to those of us (which, admittedly, is a minority here) who are watching what we eat?  It's hard enough to stick to your guns when people aren't forcing delightful scents up your nostrils!  Well, you pancake-bringers are enablers, and you're not taking me with you (today), so ha!  I say "ha!" at you and your delicious, breakfast goodness!

(Actually, this is kind of like torture.  It's smelled sooo good in here since 7:30 a.m., and I've been fighting off cravings all morning).

I weighed in on Sunday.  Still 193.0 lbs., although I did hit 192.6 at some point during the week.  At least it's not a gain, but I've had very little appetite all week, so it's very disappointing to see the scale stall after a whole week of eating like a saint.  My biggest sin was snacking on a gluten-free chocolate chip cookie -- only 160 calories!

At this point, I'm pretty sure that all of my troubles can be accounted for by the dreaded PMS Monster:

• Little/no energy for "silly things like exercise"
• Bloating (hopefully 1-2 pounds' worth)
• Salt cravings (hello, salsa and corn chips!)
• Taking my irritability out on pancake-eating co-workers via a passive-aggressive blog
• Tearfulness (when I think about all of the amazing foods I can't eat anymore)
• Feeling important enough to post a blog about the PMS Monster

So my plan is to defeat this mini-success-plateau before it turns into a six-week-long-plateau-of-no-weight-change-that-makes-you-cranky-enough-that-you-binge-then-fall-off-the-wagon kind of deal.

Despite the humidity, I'm going for a walk on my 15-minute break this afternoon.  I shall return a sweaty triumph, and then I'll drink a ton of water, and it'll be amazing.  Maybe I'll even walk up the 8 flights of stairs to my cubie!  Hmm... that's a big maybe.  Or maybe I'll walk up 4 flights instead, and take the elevator the other half of the way.  Baby steps!

On the gluten-free front (for those of you who are playing along at home), I continue to learn as I go.  I accidentally "got glutened" on Friday night and spent most of the weekend wallowing in gassy, crampy agony on the couch.  I saw my doctor again on Monday, and she agreed that I seem to be responding generally well to the elimination diet.  They drew blood to run the celiac panel, and they're running a slew of other tests "just to be on the safe side."

I'm SO DONE with being sick all of the time and frequent trips to the clinic.  I'm hoping for some conclusive answers so I can get on with my life.

A Gluten-Free Me

Long story short, I learned on July 1, 2010, that I am gluten intolerant.  The doctor I saw on Thursday suggested trying an elimination diet to rule out any other food allergies, but my symptoms have completely resolved since eliminating wheat and gluten products from my diet.  I either have celiac disease (which my doctor stated is the most probable case) or a severe wheat/gluten allergy.

I'll be tested eventually to determine whether or not I have celiac disease (better to know, I guess), but right now my number one priority is learning how to live gluten-free, which is something I will probably have to do for the rest of my life.

I've been on an emotional roller-coaster.  The optimistic side of me is ecstatic, because now I'm forced to stick to a rigid diet.  Unless I want to make myself very sick, I can't go for the junky snacks that have always held me back in the past.

At the same time, I feel... angry.  Cheated.  Alone.  I've been trying to be patient with myself, because I've even been getting angry with myself for feeling the way I do.  I feel selfish, because I'm actually very lucky!  My support system is still there, helping me as I find my feet again.  My husband has done loads of research about what I can and can't eat, and is already better at de-coding food labels than I am.

I've been trying to focus on one very important fact -- I feel better now than I have in months!  It's amazing how quickly my symptoms resolved when I removed gluten from my diet, but apparently this is very normal.

Another "silver lining" -- the weight has been falling off.  The scale read 192.6 pounds this morning!

There's definitely a learning curve here; I made myself sick on Saturday after eating French salad dressing and barbecue sauce (both of which are thickened with gluten-products -- who knew?!).  Most lipsticks contain gluten, as do "lickable envelopes."  I'm overwhelmed with information, but I'm sorting it out as quickly as I can.  One step at a time.  Despite all of this, I'm still convinced that good things are happening!

Photo Credit:  "Celiacs Do It Gluten Free" image is from Healthline.com.

Weighing In

Alright, I'll admit it -- candidly. I weigh as much now as I did when I was nine months pregnant. That doesn't seem possible, especially because (back in late 2007) I was only about 15 pounds away from achieving the coveted pre-baby weight.

Thanks to an unsightly birth control faux pas, I gained back all of my hard-shed pounds, and some of their closest friends, too. Around that time, struggling through postpartum depression made the weight gain seem like too much to deal with. I felt passive -- an object that could be acted upon but could not act. It really didn't even occur to me that I could do anything about my weight gain.

I'm 5'10".

When I met my husband, I weighed 145 pounds.

When my daughter was conceived, I weighed about 160.

Presently, I weigh in at 195 pounds (BMI: 28.0).

My high weight was 199 pounds (BMI: 28.6).

My goal is to get down to 155 pounds (BMI: 22.2).

My dream is to reach 145 again (BMI: 20.8).

It might take awhile, but the work will be well worth it! Fitting into my skinny jeans again will feel so good.